The Way Ahead for 2019

January 12, 2019

The Way Ahead for 2019

 

THE WAY AHEAD FOR 2019

Welcome to 2019. How do you set yourself up for a happy, fulfilled and successful year? Many people set New Year Resolutions but these never seemed to create any difference to my life. That all changed in 2012 when I started to choose a Lighthouse Word to give me direction and purpose. The words that have given me a way to guide and direct me through my years have included:-

  • 2018 Empowerment
  • 2017 Questions
  • 2016 Focus
  • 2015 Balance & Momentum
  • 2014 Impossible which translates to I’m Possible
  • 2013 Declutter
  • 2012 Celebrate

After much deliberation over the last two weeks I have finally decided on my LIGHTHOUSE WORD for 2019 – STRENGTH.

Since adopting an annual LIGHTHOUSE WORD I have noticed positive steps in my thinking, actions, achievements, gratitude and adopted an approach to every day that creates a pathway to become an improved me every day. For 2019 I want this to contine and I want the STRENGTH to:-

  • move forward in a positive way that doesn’t drain my energy,
  • be there to suppoprt others in their difficult times,
  • respond to rather than react to situations (I find reacting to situations  very energy draining),
  • ask for help when I need it both personally and professionally,
  • step out of my confort zone both personally and professionally so that I can explore new opportunities and grow,
  • admit to those close to me that I may not be coping as well as I would like,
  • move forward with Individually You and create new workshops and an online program,
  • make improved choices so that my fitness and health continues to support me in the way I want it too,
  • recognise when I need to step away from things and have some down time,
  • give myself opportunities to engage in more creative pursuits such as collage, gardening, music,
  • to take care of myself and feel the gratitude that is in my life,
  • to make a difference to my own life as well as others.

The word STRENGTH is going to be my 2019 benchmark to assess whether my choices, actions, reactions, intentions, opportunites, thinking, beliefs and values are creating a stronger, more improved and happy me. It will ensure that I am accountable and guiding me to create and live a fulfilled year.

 

WHAT DOES THE WAY AHEAD FOR 2019 LOOK LIKE FOR YOU?

 

 

 

 

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Guidelines for Shopping with Friends

November 24, 2018

Guidelines for Shopping with Friends

GUIDELINES FOR SHOPPING WITH FRIENDS

Who do you shop with? Do you prefer to shop alone or with a friend? There are advantages and disadvantages for shopping alone or with a friend. This guideline for shopping with friends outlines my thoughts and observations from my own and observing others shopping experiences. There can be advantages and disadvatages when you shop with someone else.

Guideline 1 – TRUST YOUSELF

Most people have the tendency to step out of the change room and ask their shopping partner this question:-

What do you think?

 When asked this question people usually respond in two ways:-

  • from what they see and how it looks or
  • from their own personal preference base of colour, style, pattern, texture and shapes.

Clothes can fit and look good on you and other people’s opinion can influence your decision or thoughts which can result in purchases that you regret and hang unworn in your wardrobe. When you only consider the fit and how it looks you are overlooking a very important element and that is how the clothing feels on you.

Before you step foot out of the changeroom look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself this all important question:-

How do I feel in this?

There is only one person who can answer this question and that is yourself. No matter how well clothing fits you and looks good on you if it doesn’t feel right then you will not feel comfortable and will not wear it. If you buy the item influenced by your friend or sales assistant’s opinions then it probably will become a put on and take off outfit and never make it out of the bedroom.

No matter how great something fits you do not buy it if it does not feel right.

Guideline 2 – KNOW YOUR PERSONALITY STYLE

How clothing feels on you strongly relates to understanding your Style Personality. Your Style Personalityy identifies the colour, shape, styles, comfort level, fabrics, scale, patterns and prints that relate to who you are. These elements combine to create your visual image that reflects who you are. This is very unique and individual.

This information about your Style Personality gives you the knowledge to understand why something that looks good and fits okay  just doesn’t seem right. With this knowledge you can be empowered by identifying what it is that doesn’t feel right.

This results in you making more informed choices about what you purchase and not be influenced by others or what’s in fashion. You know yourself and undestand what works for you. You can then make statements like :-

  • “This looks good but I don’t like the feel of the material. I know I wouldn’t wear this.”
  •   “I am not going to try this on because I don’t like wearing floral prints.”

Let me share a shopping story with you. I was shopping with a client who had brought her friend along for support. My client had great difficulty finding clothes that fitted and appealed to her. When she walked out of the change room with a smile on her face I knew she felt good in this. She also looked good in the dress.

Friend: “No, I don’t like that.”  – Clients smile disappeared.
Me: “What don’t you like?”

Friend: “The colour, I hate that colour.”
Me: “You might not like or wear that colour but how do you like it on Mary.”
Friend: “Oh, it does look good on her.” (Smile reappeared on my client’s face)

Me to Client: “How do you feel?”
Client: “I really like how it feels and looks.” (Client purchased the dress and has loved wearing it.)

If I had not questioned my client’s friend we would not have realised her response was coming from her own preferences and not really related to her friend.

Guideline 3 – Questions to Ask

The following questions are important questions and ones I ask my clients when shopping or working in their wardrobes. This helps them make informed decisions when thinking about what to buy. An individual item in the shops is only worth buying if you are going to enjoy wearing it.

Guidlines to take shopping with friends

 

These questions give you and your friends a guideline for thinking about purchases and not resonding to outside influences such as someone elses opinion or the latest trends.

When you go shopping with friends you need to support each other to buy wisely and not on impulse. You want to:-

  • Love the feel.
  • Love the look.
  • Love wearing it.

 

 

 

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Five Deadly Wardrobe Sins

November 17, 2018

Five Deadly Wardrobe Sins

Five Deadly Wardrobe Sins addresses the reasons why many women feel frustrated and challenged by their wardrobe. Many of the women I work with feel that they have nothing to wear when they actually have endless outfit options hanging in their wardrobe without realising it. This usually results in an endless cycle of shopping but not necessarily more wearable outfits.

The starting point for wardrobe frustration or overwhelm is to look at the habits and routines that have developed over time that are stopping you from exploring what you already have. If you feel frustrated with your wardrobe consider which of these wardrobe sins you could approach differently.

1.Overcrowded Wardrobe

Having an overcrowded wardrobe

  • restricts your ability to see, seek and locate clothing items.
  • results in forgetting and loosing track of what clothing items you actually have.
  • requires much more time, effort and energy to choose an outfit each morning.

SOLUTION: Create Your Own Wardrobe Boutique

Your wardrobe needs to be the storage place for:-

  • current season clothes,
  • clothes that fit your now body and lifestyle.

Any clothes that do not meet the above criteria could be stored elsewhere so that the unneccesary clutter is removed. You need room to be able to move your clothing along the hanging rail and not have a daily tug a war and wardrobe meltdowns.

For more organising tips read https: How to Have an Organised Wardrobe

2.Keep Wearing the Same Outfit Combination

Mornings can be quite a hectic time and quite often it becomes the habit to reach for a tried and true outfit. This quite often results in a feeling of boredom and thinking that you have nothing to wear. Most people wear only 20% of their clothing 80% of the time.

SOLUTION: Plan and Play

  • Change your reach and grab strategy to one that involves some wardrobe exploring. This involves planning some outfits in advance. This could be done at the weekend or the night before. The more you do this the more aware you will be of just how many potential new outfits combinations you actually have.
  • Create a look book of outfits that you enjoy wearing by taking photos. This ensures that you can remember all the elements of an outfit and have outfit inspiration on the run.

Read more here:- Style Inspiration to Create Your Outfits

3. Shopping Without a Plan

Many women go shopping without a plan of what they are looking for. You cannot create a wardrobe that supports you if you don’t know what you already have and what you need. This often results in clothing hanging in wardrobes not being worn.

SOLUTION: Create a List

Most women create a shopping list for groceries and household needs but not for their clothing needs. Create a list of the clothing items that you need to replace or need to fill the gaps in your wardrobe. When you do this you will be shopping with purpose and direction.

Read more here:- Five Questions to Take Shopping with You

4. Buying Clothes and Not Wearing Them

There are many reasons why we buy clothes and don’t wear them. If you go shopping you usually have an expectation that you will buy something and this can result in purchasing items for the wrong reasons.

SOLUTION: Ask this question?

Quite often we buy clothing just because it fits. Fit is not the only consideration when buying clothing. You need to ask this important question – HOW DOES IT FEEL? If you have any doubts no matter what other people think leave it in the shop because it will just become another orphan in your wardorbe.

When you purchase something new plan to wear it as soon as possible. Before you hang it up create at least one outfit and plan when you will wear it. Clothes that are purchased and then hung in the wardrobe can easily be forgotten.

5. Unsure  What Clothing Suits You, Your Body and Your Lifestyle

We get dressed every day but do not always feel good about it. Your clothes have the power to give you confidence and to look and feel great.

SOLUTION: Seek professional help

Contact a professional who can provide you with the knowledge and understanding so that your wardrobe supports you by giving you

CONFIDENT STYLE

YOUR WAY EVERY DAY.

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No Clothes Shopping for a Year Challenge

October 13, 2018

No Clothes Shoping For a Year Challenge

NO CLOTHES SHOPPING FOR A YEAR CHALLENGE 

Have you ever thought about under taking a no clothes shopping for a year challenge? This is exactly what one of my lovely clients ‘Michelle Jones’ decided to do. Michelle is seven months into her challenge and here is her story.

1.What prompted this year without clothes shopping challenge?

  • Throughout 2017 I listened to several TEDx talks about the ‘minimalistic’ approach to belongings and also decluttering one’s wardrobe and building up a ‘core’ collection of items for each season and from there how many outfits could be made up from the ‘core’ collection. By core items the speakers referred to the absolute minimum to build an essential wardrobe for each season so that all the clothes for that season were visible in the wardrobe. Items not relevant to the season were moved to another wardrobe or packed away in boxes. The reason for this was to make it easy to decide what to wear. Once the ‘core’items had been selected then there were some additional items that you wore infrequently, for example rain jacket and evening wear. Then there were ‘complementary core items’ which included scarves, t-shirts, jumpers, bags, jewellery and accessories. The combination of these items with the ‘core’ collection increased the number of outfits.
  • Another reason for the ‘No Clothes Shopping for a Year Challenge‘ was because I already had some outfits that I had bought but never worn because the hem needed to be shortened. Additionally some other clothes needed to be altered and I didn’t want to buy any more new clohtes until I had altered these.
  • I had a wardrobe full of clothes and wanted to work out different combinations to get more outfits.
  • It was a challenge to me to see if I could last the year.
  • Philosophically I believe that our society is becoming very materialistic and that advertising influences us to keep buying even though we can do without the new item. In 2012 and 2017 I visited Myanmar (Burma) and I was influenced by the gentleness of the people I met and their happiness despite their lack of items which in Western Society we consider essential.

2.What guidleines did you set yourself?

I could buy accessories, for example handbags, shoes, and scarves to complement my wardrobe and in this way get more outfits. As I can sew very well if I wanted new clothes then I would use my resourcefulness and buy the fabric and sew the item. However so far I have not had the time to sew anything.

3. Describe your shopping habits prior to this challenge.

Usually I waited until the Christmas and the mid-year sales to buy clothes and then would buy items that I already had the right colour accessories for or would complement other items in my wardrobe. Every now and then I would buy some items not on sale that I ‘loved’ and always gave me a special feeling whenever I wore them. I also bought clothes that I didn’t particulary like which were bought in a hurry because I thought I did not have enough clothes to wear to work. This was because I had not taken the time the previous evening to work out an outfit to wear the following day. When I woke up in the morning I would just stare at my clothes and think “What will I wear today?” and be in a hurry to select an outfit.

4. What concerns did you have in regard to not shopping for a year?

I was concerned that I would not last the year. In fact, in March I couldn’t resist buying two beautiful outfits at full price. This was an impulse buy because as yet I have not worn either outfit. As I bought these on 12/03/2018 I now need to wait the full year until 12/03/2019 before I can buy new clothes. If I ended this challenge on the original date 31/12/18 then I would not have finished the one year challenge.

5. What are you finding challenging?

  • My biggest challenge is not to buy any clothes. I love fabrics and new styles and I have to avoid going into dress shops in case I am tempted to buy something.
  • I also watch several current affairs programs on television and am constantly reminded what the latest fashions are because the current female presenters wear them. It is a challenge to override the urge to buy similar styled outfits or prints.
  • It’s been difficult and yet at the same time rewarding that I have stuck it ou so far. After I did the ‘Work Your Wardrobe’ workshop with Individually You I was very aware that I needed more neutrals, brown and cream in my wardrobe to maximise my numbers of outfits. However because of the challenge I have to wait until the end of it to buy them.
  • At present I need a pair of dark blue jeans because my other pairs have faded and the challenge is not to buy a new pair. A new pair would enable me to have more outfits for a Friday work day because my work has a policy of ‘Friday Jeans Day.’ The next challenge is to find the time to sew the jeans. I would selct a simple skinny leg style without pockets and then wear tops that end under my hip line as that length is most flattering for me.

6. What has changed for you?

  • I’m giving more thought on how to combine clothes to get different outfits and how to change one outfit with different accessories.
  • When I recently bought a scarf I gave great thought to the colour and selected the scarf so the colours would complement several outfits in my wardrobe to give them a different look.
  • I’m more comfortable wearing styles in public that I only wore at home, for example wearing very fitted clothes and shorter hemlines which flatter my figure. Wearing the fitted style in public increased the number of  outfits for work.
  • I now take time the night before to select the outfit that I will wear to work the next day and also iron it and clean the shoes that go with the outfit so it will be ready for the next day.
  • I’m more aware of what looks great on someone. I ask myself why and then see if I might get the similar outfit with what I have in my wardrobe.
  • I’ve changed hair dressers and now have a modern hairstyle that suits me better.

7. What are you learning about yourself?

  • I have perserverance to stick things out. Even though I bought the 2 impulse items two and half months into the challenge(mid-March) I have shown resilience by not buying anything since then which is now 7 months later (mid October).
  • I understand my wardrobe better and so far have been pleasantly surprised that I am getting a larger number of different outfits even though I haven’t bought any new clothes.
  • Just because I am not buying clothes I can still learn more about my wardrobe hence I enrolled in Individually You’s ‘Work Your Wardrobe’ workshop.
  • I’ve learnt that ‘less is more’  and it’s taking me less time to manage my wardrobe.
  • I’ve learnt to manage my time better and the value of setting time aside to continue the work of decluttering my wardrobe to have my ‘core’ items for each season.
  • This one year challenge has reminded me of the role of clothes in one’s life and how we can use them to ‘ power dress’ and the big part they play in non-verbal communication when people first meet and form an opinion about someone.

Thank you ‘Michelle’ for sharing your ‘No Clothes Shopping for a Year Challenge’ story.  You are an inspiration. Your persistence and resilence is to be admired. You have really got me thinking but I know I wouldn’t set myself a year long challenge but possibly one or 2 months. The question would be which months would I choose. Look forward to hearing from you after your ‘No Clothes Shopping for Year Challenge’ ends.

 

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What Self Care Looks Like for Me

September 25, 2018

What self care looks like for me

 

WHAT SELF CARE LOOKS LIKE FOR ME

Self Care is a concept that has been around for a while and will be different for each individual. It has taken some time to grasp what it means for me. It is not about anybody else but is entirely self focussed and involves:-
– Accepting who you are.
– Believing in yourself.
– Caring about yourself.

My approach to self care focusses on both internal and external processes and activities.  It is  all about how I am being each day and realising how my thoughts and expectations may be  influencing and affecting my actions and reactions.

This is the what and how my internal self care process over the last year:-

  • Being a friend to myself – a friend is kind, accepting, supportive, encouraging, helpful and uplighting.
  • Finding ways to quieten and shut down my inner critic monster who wants to put me down, tell me I am not good enough or you can’t do that and  compare me with others. Did you know that the person you hear from or talk to most each day is yourself? No matter how much other people mention your positive attributes you still tend to believe that inner critic monster who just wants to derail you with irrational thoughts.
  • Creating a new habit – A year ago I planted a great big red STOP SIGN inside my head in an attempt to derail my negative thoughts and messages. Every time that voice tried to interfere my STOP SIGN would pop up and push it aside. Over time this has worked for me and I have been quite surprised at how much power I was giving away to something that only existed inside my head. However on days when I am feeling tired or overwhelmed that inner critic tries to rear it’s ugly head.
  • There is no such thing as perfection. I think that perfection is great friends with our inner critic and wants us to feel we are never good enough because  we don’t look a certain way, have a big house, an expensive car or travel the world. Once again comparison becomes the enemy and places us in a negative space if we let it.
  • Looking for the magic moments in my day.
  • Checking in with myself regularly to recognise how my thoughts and actions are helping or hindering my day and reframing if I  need to.
  • Gifting myself and others with a compliment each day.

My external self care process involves doing activities that I enjoy and make me feel whole. These activitie include:-

  • being in my garden
  • reading each night before sleeping
  • taking the time for a long soak in the bath with lots of bubbles (maybe once a month)
  • doing a creative activity such as collaging, knitting, sewing, gardening
  • catching up with friends
  • going on a date with my husband
  • pilates class once a week and home program three times a week

All these activities involve people or involve creating and keep my tank full. These activities need to be scheduled into my monthly diary.

For me it is about looking out for myself and valuing me as a person

To contribute to anyone else’s life you need to feel good about your self. This let’s you give more in a positive way without draining your own energy.

What is your version of self care?

 

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How to Organise Your Wardrobe to Prepare for Moving

August 25, 2018

How to Organise Your Wardrobe to Prepare for Moving

First appeared in @ashbypartners

HOW TO ORGANISE YOUR WARDROBE to PREPARE FOR MOVING

Moving house can be a hig stress event. Quite often packing up clothing items is one of the last jobs on your very long to do list. This can result in clothing items being packed in a hurry and without any sense of order.

Let’s look at some tips for:-

  1. Packing up your wardrobe to make it easier to find what what you need when you move.
  2. Cleaning the wardrobe chaos and clutter before you move house.
  3. Organising your wardrobe in your new home

What to do before moving:-

Don’t wait till the last minute to pack up your wardrobe. Taking time before your final packing days to start to sort and cull your wardrobe will mean that you are only taking the clothes that are relevant to your NOW life. Why waste the time packing items that you don’t wear, do not fit or no longer support your lifestyle only to discard them at your new destination or to rehang  them and let them take up valuable space in your new wardrobe.

The process I am suggesting involves  setting up a system of labelled packing boxes, bags or suitcases that you can place clothing as you are sorting and culling. Suggested labels for these storage containers could include:-

  • Trash:- Clothes you no longer wear or do not fit  but are not in good enough condition to give away.
  • Take Aways:- Clothes in good enough condition that you can give away to charity and friends.
  • Treasures:- Clothes that you are keeping and are appropriate for the current season. If possible keep these clothes on their hangers for transporting. Put straight into your new wardrobe.
  • Out of Season:- Sorting your clothes according to seasons means that you don’t have to unpack the out of season clothes on arrival at your new home.
  • Memories:- S0metimes we have clothes in our wardrobe that hold precious memories and we find it difficult to part with. Pack these into separate boxes / suitcase and store as a memory box at your new location. I have some of the special dresses my mother sewed for me hanging as wall art in bedrooms.
  • Maybe:- There are always clothes that we are not sure about keeping. If you pack these separately then you can rethink them at another time.

Go through everything in your wardrobe and use these questions to help guide your packing decisions.

  1. Do I wear this?
  2. Does it fit me?
  3. Can it be altered?
  4. Do I enjoy wearing this?
  5. How does it make me feel?
  6. Does it support my present lifestyle?
  7. Where and how can I wear this?
  8. Am I likely to wear it in the near future?
  9. Does it easily coordinate with other clothing?
  10. Would I buy this again?

It can be helpful to pack a couple of suitcases / boxes with a number of outfits for each family member so that on moving day you are able to easily locate something to wear.

Wardrobe Organisation Tips for Your New Wardrobe

A wardrobe without organisation makes it difficult to find clothing items and easy to forget what you have.

Here are some steps for organising your new wardrobe space:-

  • See and Reach Principle – Hang as much as possible. Clothing that is not clearly visible and easy to reach can be forgotten.
  • Arrange in Wardrobe      – Hang same with same:- skirts, tops, pants, dresses, jackets etc. Within each clothing group                                                                       organise into same colours, light to dark, plains and patterns.
  • Out of Season Clothing   – Free up space in your wardrobe by storing these items elsewhere. Utilise space under beds, top                                                              shelf of wardrobes or unused suitcases.
  • Rolling                                   – Rolling clothing items that do not crease can make it easier to locate in drawers or baskets.

Your wardrobe plays a very important part in your daily life so taking the time to plan your decluttering and packing process can ease the transition into your new home.

Individually You can asssist with this task.

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Lessons from the Last Decade

June 30, 2018

Ten Lessons from the Last Decade

 

WHAT HAVE BEEN MY TEN LESSONS FROM THE LAST DECADE 

June is my birthday month and I have celebrated turning 60 and feel very privileged to be moving into the next decade of my life. It has been a great adventure and time of reflection for me. I realise that the last ten years have involved much change for me both personally and professionally. Moving into the next decade of my life has prompted me to look back at what :-

  • has changed for me
  • is different for me and
  • what lessons I have learnt.

These are my ten life lessons from the last decade:-

LESSON 1 –  Step Out of Your Comfort Zone

Just over ten years ago I stepped out of my comfort zone and resigned from a much loved 26 year teaching career. I had no idea what I was going to do next and while this felt right for me it certainly was scary. There was much self doubt about what I could and would do next. I tried very hard to let myself believe that something would come up and let myself be open to the thought of new and different opportunites.

What happened next was a complete surprise. I applied for a job as a Kitchen Designer and thought I had nothing to lose, at the very least I might get some interview practice. Well I walked out of the interview in a state of shock and fear – I got the job and believed I had no skills in this area. Many sleepless nights followed because of my self doubts and feelings of not being good enough. Yes it certainly was a steep learning curve and challenging for me but I came to realise that my teaching career had given me many skills that I had not realised were transferable to different situations. Doubting your own capabilities only limits your possibilities.

Career wise I was not finished stepping out of my comfort zone. I also decided to undertake study in Personal Styling and Image Consultancy which led me to make the terrifying decision to start my own business. This has been the most terrifying, challenging and wonderful experience. and I am so glad I stepped out of my comfort zone and let myself be open to new challenges.

 LESSON 2 – Permission to Say No Without Guilt

I use to chase my tail most of the time with an overcrowded work, social and family commitments. I couldn’t say no and was always juggling my calendar to fit everything in. I think I didn’t want to miss out on anything and thought that if I said no I wouldn’t be asked again. Yes, I realise now not saying no had a lot to do with my own self worth. This approach left very little time for me to think about myself, perhaps I was just trying to avoid this.

Now that has changed. I realised that I was not super human (oh no) and running myself into the ground. This was not a very healthy and productive way to live. I can now say no without guilt and I am stronger in both mind and body because of this. My schedule now allows for ‘me’ time.

LESSON 3 – Accept and Believe in Yourself

I was not always a friend to myself. My self doubts were crippling me. I always thought I had a positive approach to life but neglected to realise that my internal voice was always one of self doubt and saboutage. No matter how positive I was on the outside my inner self was always doubting and beating me up. Developing a sense of self worth and  self acceptance started to happen after I did my Personal Styling and Image Consultancy training. I now was working from an inside out approach and truly looking at who I really was. I could never have imagined the imapct of this. Over the last five years I have developed a much stronger internal platform to face what life throws at me because I value, accept and believe in myself. I really like the person that I am.

LESSON 4 – You Can’t be Everything to Everyone

What a lesson this was. I have always been someone who wanted to be there for others but the problem was I wanted to be able to fix everything for them. That is not possible. You can be there to support, help and guide others but you cannot fix their problems.

LESSON 5 – I Know My WHY

Why do we do the things we do? This is a big question that is not easy to answer while we are busy living day to day. When I was starting my Individually You I was asked the question ‘What is Your Why,’ I didn’t have an answer. It took much reflection, time and energy for me to realise that my WHY was to make a difference. I want to make a difference every day to myself and everyone that I meet. I want to give people a reson to smile  feel good about themselves. Realising this has had a positive impact on my internal thoughts and external behaviours in my personal and professional life. It kept me accountable to being true to the person I wanted to be. Thank you Shar Moore  for asking me this question.

LESSON 6 – Connecting with Others is Important for Me

Working from home made me realise how much I enjoyed and needed to be with people. When I first started to work from home it took me a while to realise that my energy levels, productivity and feelings of motivation were decreasing when I wasn’t interacting with others. I enjoy and need to be around others to feel balanced so now make time and plan for this.

LESSON 7 – My Emotions and Thoughts and Actions have a Strong Impact on My Overall Wellbeing

Why did it take me soooo long to realise this? To be physically and emotionally strong relates very much to my own sense of self belief, self acceptance and self care. When I carried around and supported my negative emotions and thoughts I created so much unneeded tension within my body. This created physical pain and illness. Now that my internal thoughts and feelings are stronger I am not as reactive and approach most days in a positive frame of mind. I am not sweating the little stuff.

LESSON 8 – Just Do It Now

Procrastination is an energy drain. Quite often I would delay doing some tasks. These were usually small tasks that really wouldn’t take long to do or tasks that I didn’t like doing. These tasks would pile up and annoy me. Sometimes it was simply moving something from one area of the house to where it actually belonged or filling out a form – (don’t like paperwork).

I made a conscious decision to adopt a DO IT NOW approach towards these tasks. When I would see something that was annoying me such as the folded washing still sitting on the lounge or the hand basin needing a clean a voice in my head now yells JUST DO IT NOW and you will feel better. This has worked for me. I also try to start my work day doing a task that I don’t like so at least I feel good about making progress instead of feeling guilty and having this task hanging over my head.

LESSON 9 – Self Care is Important

Self care starts with the little things we do for ourselves each day. It is not to be confused with being selfish. The first step towards self care for me was accepting and liking myself and trying to turn off my inner critic. The next step involved taking notice of how my body was feeling because I realised that my body reacted with pain when I wasn’t taking care of myself. Self care will be different for everyone. When your body lets you down then you are not able to support others or yourself.

LESSON 10 – Age Does Not Define YOU

Being a year older does not have to mean you are old. Being old is a state of mind, yes changes happen to our body but that is so for everyone. The only alternative to having another birthday is death and that is not an option I want.  I want  this decade to be one of strength, style, surprises and celebrations.

“Age is out of your control.

How you handle it though, is in your hands.”

Diane von Furstenburg

 

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B is for Bra Support

May 25, 2018

B is for Bra Support

 

B IS FOR BRA SUPPORT

Most women overlok a very important element when creating an outfit. This element isn’t even visible but it can impact on how flattering and enhancing your outfit appears as well as how comfortable you feel. You can change the look of an outfit by wearing a good fitting bra.

BENEFITS OF WEARING A WELL FITTING BRA

  • Breasts will be supported and uplifted so that the fullest part of your breasts sits halfway between your shoulders and elbow thus lengthening the mid section of your body and creating the illusion of a waist even if you don’t have one.
  • Stay uplifted and supported by adjusting the straps of you bra as they stretch over time. Ideally you want to be able to fit no more than two fingers between the strap and your body.
  • Your overall silhouette will be enhanced.
  • Comfort is improved greatly. You avoid boob spillage, straps digging into your shoulders or falling off and the band riding up all the time.
  • Can have a reduced impact on back, neck and shoulder pain especially if your breasts are larger.
  • Save time, money and frustration by shopping where there is a professional fitter. I had my first bra fitting five years ago and it  is the best thing I ever did. Size is determined by circumference measurement of your breast (cup size) and circumference of the area just below the breasts (band size). If you need a bigger cup size you need to godown a band size.

 

FIND THE RIGHT BRA SUPPORT

NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF A WELL FITTED BRA 

SUPPORT YOURSELF EMOTIONALLY AND PHYSICALLY BY HAVING A PROFESSIONAL BRA FITTING

 

FURTHER READING:

What is Your Bra Doing for You?

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Style

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What is Your Shoe Style?

May 11, 2018

What is your shoe style?

 

WHAT IS YOUR SHOE STYLE?

Shoes are an important element when putting together an outfit, look what they did for Cinderella and Dorothy. There are shoes for for all ocassions,  varied styles and in many colours.

Everyone has unique style preferences when it comes to choosing the shoes that are ‘just right’ for them. These style preferences relate to your Personality Style. The elements that relate to your shoe Personality Style include:-

  • colour,
  • shapes and styles,
  • comfort level,
  • level of detail,
  • heel shape and height,
  • fabric choice

Last week I visited Tascha at Mainstreet Shoes in Queanbeyan and talked all things shoe related.  Let’s look at What’s Your Shoe Style. Remember when you look at these photos that your shoe preferences can be a combination of a few of these Personality Styles.

 

CLASSIC SHOE STYLE

Classic shoes have a timeless, understated classy look. They are mainly in neutral colours with a low vamp and do not have much detail. The classic style includes court shoes with low to medium heel height.

 

NATURAL / RELAXED SHOE STYLE

 Natural / Relaxed shoe styles are generally practical, comfortable and functional with a no fuss look. A low heel is the preferred option with comfort being the number one factor in selecting shoes. The patterned floral print shoe at the front is a combination of  relaxed / natural style with a feminine floral print in creative colours.

 

FEMININE SHOE STYLE

Feminine shoe styles include court shoes, ballet flats and slip ons. Heels can be low or high and usually in colours to match outfits. These shoes will not be shiny or chunky but will have soft feminine features such as bows, ribbons, lace, flowers and sparkles.

 

CREATIVE SHOE STYLE

Creative shoe styles include shoes with quirky and interesting detail such as unusual construction, styles, shapes, any patterns and combination of colours. These shoe styles will make a statement and create a focal point in your outfit.

 

DRAMATIC SHOE STYLE

Dramatic shoe styles are usually bold, and make a modern, contemporary statement. High heels, stilettos and pointed toes are usually preferred to flats. Geometric, graphic and animal prints are favoured. The animal print flat shoe would be a combination of relaxed and dramtic because of the animal print.

 

ELEGANT CHIC SHOE STYLE

Elegant Chic shoe styles have a modern, sophisticated look. They are usually court shoes or ballet flat styles with metal decorations such as discs, buckles and flat squares. Preferred colours are usually light to medium neutrals – grey, camel, browns, burgundies and blues but nothing too dark or bright.

 

REBELLIOUS / SEXY SHOE STYLE

Rebellious / Sexy shoe styles are those that are somewhat unconventional or really sexy. The favoured colour is black and more black. Shoe styles in this group include doc martins, motorcyle boots, metal detailing such as chains, spikes and buckles and very high sexy styles.

Take a look at the shoes you love to wear and take note of the elements that you like to wear. These elements become your Shoe Personality.

 

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Your Wardrobe Health Checklist

April 26, 2018

Your Wardrobe Health Checklist

 

YOUR WARDROBE HEALTH CHECKLIST

Have you ever thought about the health of your wardrobe? This Wardrobe Health Checklist outlines the elements that contribute to creating a wardrobe that supports you physically and emotionally.  Go from wardrobe worries to wardrobe wonder.

How much of the clothing in your wardrobe are you wearing?
Most people wear only 20% of their clothing 80% of the time. That means there can be a large number of clothing items not adding value to your wardrobe. These unworn items need to be looked at to determine of they have a place in your now life and can be combined with other items to create outfits that you will wear.

How Organised is Your Wardrobe?
If you had to rate the organisation of your wardrobe on a scale of 1 – 10 what would it be? A wardrobe without organisation makes it very difficult to find clothing items  and easy to forget what you have. If you can’t easily see and locate items then you will not be wearing them. This can result in:-

  • wardrobe frustrations,
  • daily dressing dilemmas,
  • thinking you have nothing to wear,
  • boredom because you are repeat wearing the same outfits,
  • buying items similar to what you already have because you forgot you had them,
  • spending money on clothing that you may not need or will never wear.

An organised wardrobe is essential for a healthy wardrobe that contributes positively to your daily dressing needs. Read S.O.C. Wardrobe Challenge Task 1 and S.O.C. Wardrobe Challenge Task 2  for a the steps to create an organised wardrobe.

Does the Clothing in Your Wardrobe Fit?

Any clothing that does not fit you physically or support your current lifestyle does not deserve a space in your wardrobe. If you have clothes that do not fit and you wish to keep them store them somewhere other than in your wardrobe. This means that your wardrobe space is reserved for clothing that fits and supports your current day to day needs as well as taking account of changes to our body shape.

How does the Clothing in Your Wardrobe Make You Feel?

This is an important question to ask yourself when shopping or creating an outfit. If you don’t feel right in an item of clothing or outfit than you will not wear it no matter how well it might fit. The clothes in your wardrobe need to fit you physically as well as feel right. If something doesn’t feel right than it indicates that it is not part of your Personality Style. Your Personality Style preferences influences 80% of your style choices and therefore is a strong determining factor to ensure you buy clothes that you are going to love to wear. The elements that influence your preferred choices includes:-

  • colours,
  • comfort level,
  • patterns & prints,
  • level of detail in clothing,
  • accessories,
  • shoe style,
  • make up,
  • scale,
  • hair styles,
  • underwear.

Take a look at the clothes that you are not wearing, Try them on and determine whether they feel right. If they don’t feel right then they may not be meeting your Personality Style preferences.

Quite often when we go shopping others will think that an outfit looks great on you and it probably does but you may feel it isn’t right. Remember to trust your instincts and feeling and say ‘this fits, looks good but isn’t for me.’

Discovering your unique sytyle preferences is part of Individually You’s workshops and style consultations.

What Colours are in Your Wardrobe?

A healthy wardrobe is one where the colour palette cohesively works together to create mix and match outfits. If you have a limited or a mismatched colour palette then it will can be difficult to combine the various clothing items into outfits. When looking at your colour palette don’t forget to take notice of coats, jackets, shoes, necklaces, earrings, scarves, hats and bags.

Neutrals are colours that are not on the colour wheel such as black, navy, charcoal, beige, camel, grey white sand, cream, brown. Having a selection of three different neutrals can give you a greater range of outfit combinations and lessen the impact of feeling bored. Your neutral pieces provide the foundation of key items in your wardrobe. All your other colours need to coordinate with these.

Check to see what other colours you have in your wardrobe and how well they combine together. Everyone has individual colour preferences they prefer to wear. Your wardrobe will always work for you if your colour choices are in harmony with each other and your complexion. When you wear colours that are not in tune with your personal colouring you will not look as healthy, vibrant and glowing.

A colour draping season with a Personal Stylist can discover the best colours for you.

Does the Clothing in Your Wardrobe Suit Your Lifestyle Needs?

You need to keep check of how your wardrobe is supporting your daily needs and determine what type  and level of refinement you need according to your hobbies, personal life, work and social needs. Keeping clothes for a maybe or one day occasion can clutter up your wardrobe and make dressing each a challenge.

What Does Your Wardrobe Need?

Your wardorbe needs clothes that make you feel and look great. The clothes you choose to wear need to bring you joy and be ‘just right’ for you – they need to have the Goldilock’s Principle.

You might also like to read:-

How to Connect the Dots in Your Wardrobe

What Your Wardrobe Doesn’t Need

7 Effective Wardrobe Habits

 

 

 

 

 

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Wardrobe

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